"Uncle Mauno will be your babysitter today. Mauno's girlfriend will be here too. She's really nice too." ('YH-isä' is short for 'yksinhuoltajaisä' which literally means single parent father)

"Remember to behave nicely. At least sometimes." "I think I can do that."

"Ok here they are probably."

"Hi Joni and Max. Here's my girlfriend Jane." "Hi, nice to meet you."

"Okay, you guys have fun. I'm going for the date" "Jaw to chest and towards new disappointments."

"Why don't you take your boy with you for the date?"

"Bad idea. Ok, bye!"

"Well John, what do you want to do today?"

"I want to eat candy." "We'll eat candy after food."

"This is injustice."

"But we can watch some movie soon." "Yaaay!"

"I'll go to the toilet."

"How old are you, Joni?" "I'm five years old. How about you?"

"I'm thirty three."

"But when you are a bit older, remember that a gentleman always remembers woman's birthday but never her age."

"Why do you have dark skin?" "I have dark skin because I'm from South Africa."

"In South Africa, most people have dark skin. It protects from the Sun.

"That's useful. I want dark skin too." "Okay. It's good that you have dreams."

"How long will it take uncle Mauno? Are you pooping?"

"Um I'm not pooping, but the toilet got stuck. But the situation is under control."

"How can it be stuck then... Admit it. You've eaten too much fibre again." "But hey, konjac jelly is good for your health."

"Can you wipe your butt yourself?" "Of course I can. I'm not a small child."

"That's not what I have heard."

"I like you. Do you like me?" "Yes, you're a nice boy."

"Can you be my mother?" "Um... Well... Maybe some kind of a part-time..."

"How long have you lived in Finland?" "I've lived in FInland for four years."

"At one point, I lived in Sweden too. Have you lived abroad already, Joni?"

"With dad, we lived in a hotel in Tallinn for one night." "One night is not quite living, _I would say_."

"Onko sulla siskoja tai veljiä?" "I do. I have two brothers and one sister."

"Do you work?" "Yes, I'm a researcher."

"What do you study?" "I study genes."

"Genes... What are genes?"

"Weell... Genes are sort of small machines inside us."

"Are you a robot?!"

"I'm not. All people have sort of small biological machines inside them."

"Pheh, you scared me there."

"Do you like your work?"

"I do like it. Our lab has mice too. We do reasearch on them."

"Although _some people believe that_ on the contrary, the mice are doing research on us."

"It's good that you are curious. _As you may know_, curiosity is an important component of intelligence." (That conversational connector gives you some protection against getting accused of mansplaining."

"Do you like living in Finland?" "Weell, Finland has its good and bad sides."

"It's fun here most of the time, when you know the funniest places, people and events. This country has a lot of beautiful nature." (I do know that not everybody has it easy here, for various reasons.)

"Okay, job done."

"Did you wash your hands?"

"I did wash them. Okay, how about we watch some cartoon?"

"Yeees!"

"Look Joni. I have a new phone."

"Nice, isn't it?" "Did it come out of your stomach?"

"Just put the cartoon rolling, and fast."